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Monday, April 16, 2012

Seek those things above

Colossians 3:1-3 "Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.  Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on the earth. For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God."

I've had a little break from blogging.  The in-laws came and we had so much fun with them.  I took a break from all things dealing with the computer, even from school.  It was very nice to have a break.  But I was ready to come back when it was time.

New carpets coming have me cleaning out my closet.  While I am doing that I decided to de-clutter a lot of things.  Not everything that comes out of the closet has to go back in.  So with that in mind, I started to go through my memory box.  It holds things that my dh and I have held dear at some point in time and not wanted to let go.

Through this process letters were gone through.  I read through my letters to dh while we were dating and his to me.  It was fun to go back and remember what I desired at that time and put my focus on what fun it is to be a wife and care for the home.  Lots of times I forget.  Also amongst those letters were letters from my dad and an aunt and the time was around when my mom passed away.  I was so blessed to remember how these two and others as well, carried me through this time in prayer and in letters that were so touching.  I pray that I can minister to another in such a way.

But all this reading brought grief as well.  I remembered the hurt and pain to go through losing my mother.  Also bad weather, decisions about homeschooling and whether or not to take on another baby, all were weighing heavily on my brain.  I haven't had time to process all this or to discuss things with dh.  I lay in bed wondering if our decision was right.  How can I care for others' children and still teach well.  I couldn't even focus my mind enough to pray.  Do others look down on me?  What if they think that I'm being irresponsible?  What if...?  What if...?  What if...?  All my learning from Elizabeth George that what if's and if only's are worriers went out the window.  I needed sleep but sleep wouldn't come. 

Today I needed to read the verses above.  Actually they aren't on my schedule for studying Colossians yet, but I needed their reminder today.  What matters is that dh and I prayed about homeschooling.  We were entrusted by God with our children and this decision is ours.  I committed it to the Lord and realized that if we are together on this, either way it will be good for our kids.  In our opinions there is nothing wrong with public school, nor is it wrong to homeschool.  

As to the other issues, they are still not settled.  A tiny baby girl will join our motley crew during the weekdays starting Wednesday.  I have plans to make a little corner of our home into a nursery.  We still have a girl who occasionally comes for a weekend when her parents are working.  God is working in our lives and we need to trust Him.  I need to seek Him and come what may trust Him for the outcome.  Others have their opinions, and we may do things differently next year, but for this year decisions have been made.

One thing I must say is I have friends who have chosen differently and that's fine with me.  They know their family and they know how God is leading them.  The thing I find most comforting is when a friend disagrees with a decision and yet supports you and encourages you through it.  Obviously we are not talking about sin issues, but preference issues.

And with all that rambling, I will close.

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